Bud Selig Can’t Hear You

Bud Selig is having trouble hearing you. And he want’s to help you out, friend. But he can’t quite make it out, whatever it is you’re saying.

i still cant um

You’re not even facing Bud Selig. Don’t walk away while you’re saying that to Bud Selig.

idiot says what

Wait a minute. The water is running. Turn off the water and then come in here and tell Bud Selig whatever it is you’re trying to tell him.

one more time

We’re in an open air situation and Bud Selig is doing the best he can.

yeah i uh

The guy behind Bud Selig is talking louder than you. He is trying to block him out now. Please repeat what you were saying to Bud Selig.

come again

Hold- hold on… A motorcycle is passing. A mo- I said a motorcycle is passing! Okay it’s far enough away now. Please repeat your question to Bud Selig.


Turn down the radio! Who even listens to the fucking radio anymore?

close up

Just let Bud Selig come a little closer so he can hear you. That’s it just whisper in ol’ Bud Selig’s ear there…

These are valid possibilities, in my mind, as to why Bud Selig might be straining to hear the words that you offer to him across the air. My wife prefers another explanation, an explanation which I will present to you below as it was presented to me.

“The ‘lluminati.”





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About ra_rowe

A long suffering Padres fan who grew up in San Diego, and moved to Pasadena, Rowe works as a Junior Product Manager and writes poetry in addition to knowing everything about baseball.

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